


Hide and seek

by swallowthewhale



Series: Killervibe Week [15]
Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Killervibe Week, Killervibe Week 2019, Past Abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-26
Updated: 2019-08-26
Packaged: 2020-09-23 21:36:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,559
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20347111
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/swallowthewhale/pseuds/swallowthewhale
Summary: It starts as a favor; there’s no other tables open in the library. Then they learn they have compatible studying styles, and so they start sitting together every day, and having lunch together, and helping each other with class work. Pretty soon everyone thinks they’re dating.Killervibe Week 2019: Fake Dating





	Hide and seek

All of the tables in the library are full. Cisco’s heart sinks. He’d meant to get there an hour earlier, but Barry and his new girlfriend, Iris, hadn’t cleared out of his room quickly enough for him to get his stuff and make it to the library by the time it opened. He really should have sprung for one of those private study room rentals, but a hundred bucks had seemed like too much to drop at the beginning of the semester when it could pay for a whole month of food.

Cisco wanders around aimlessly for a while, searching futilely for an empty table or a friend. No such luck. He’s seriously contemplating relocating to the student union, a genuinely subpar option, when he spots a familiar face. Not a friendly face per se, since every time he sees her she looks like she would bite your nose off for saying hello. Well, a bad option is better than no option at all, Cisco thinks cheerfully, and the worst she can say is no.

“Excuse me?”

Caitlin glances up. “Yes?”

“Do you mind if I sit here?” Cisco tries very hard not to fidget. “Library’s booked out.”

Caitlin looks around like she hadn’t even noticed the room had filled up. “Do I know you?”

He grins. “Gen chem. I think you’re in my lab.”

She holds out her hand. “Caitlin.”

“Cisco.” He shakes her hand and she clears off the other side of the table. “Thanks.”

They don’t talk, which suits Cisco just fine, because he has four midterms this week and twenty hours of work at his job. The next day, Cisco arrives to find his side of the table already clear. Caitlin gives him a tiny smile. A couple hours in, she asks if he’d done the practice exam for chemistry. And thus begins a beautiful study buddy relationship.

A week after Cisco meets Caitlin, he’s jogging across campus, not his favorite activity, to grab a quick bite during his lunch break from work. Of course, the dining hall is packed, and Cisco hops in the shortest line, looking around for a free table while he waits. By the time he gets his food the tables are still full, and he wanders around until he spots Caitlin, who’s waving at him.

“Hey,” he says, sliding into the seat across from her.

“Hi,” she replies. “You got here just a little too late. The crowd came ten minutes ago.”

Cisco groans. “I know. But I work across campus and I can’t get here fast enough.”

Caitlin smiles at him sympathetically. “Where do you work?”

Cisco perks up. “Dr. Wells’ lab, in the engineering department.”

“Do you like him?” Caitlin asks, picking up her fork again. “I’m thinking about taking his intro to biomedical engineering next year.”

“He’s great,” Cisco enthuses. “Really supportive and super approachable.”

“So you’re majoring in engineering?”

“To my parent’s dismay,” Cisco says. “They wanted me to be a doctor.” He rolls his eyes. “Even though _Dante_ can live at home without a job while he waits for his “big break” and they’ll never be disappointed.”

Caitlin smiles wryly. “I’m pre-med. I’ve always wanted to be a doctor, though, even though my mom would rather I do medical research like her.”

Cisco taps her glass with his. “To not making our parents proud,” he cheers sarcastically and Caitlin laughs.

“Is Dante your brother?” Caitlin asks, and that’s enough to set them off swapping stories about their families’ high expectations. Forty-five minutes into Cisco’s lunch break, he has to beg off to make it back to the lab, but they sit together at lunch the next day, and the next, and the next, until they have an unspoken lunch routine, often after mornings in the library together.

“Are you going to the Halloween Festival Friday?” Cisco asks the last week in October during lunch.

Caitlin shrugs. “Don’t we have a chem exam the next Monday?”

Cisco nudges her with his shoulder. “So? You have all weekend? You’ll ace the test, let’s relax. Iris and Barry want to meet you.”

Caitlin blushes, ducking her head. “Okay, let’s go.”

The day of the Halloween Festival is unusually warm, so anyone who might have been scared off by cold weather is out in force. Iris and Caitlin meet Cisco and Barry at their dorm before walking down to the quad together. Barry and Iris are already arm in arm, giggling quietly to each other by the time they reach the festival.

“They’re still in the lovestruck honeymoon phase,” Cisco whispers to Caitlin.

She smiles. “That must be fun for you.”

“I sleep in the hallway a lot,” Cisco says jokingly, then spots caramel apples, and grabs Caitlin’s hand to pull her over.

They’re both blushing madly when he lets it go, and Cisco fumbles with his wallet to buy a caramel apple for each of them. The lady behind the counter winks at him when she hands over the apples and Cisco wishes for the ground to swallow him whole. Is he that obvious?

They mill around, admiring the pumpkin carving contest and making bets on which pie will win the baking contest, running into people they know from classes and their dorms. All of Cisco’s friends slap him lightly on the shoulder and congratulate him in forms ranging from “you guys are cute” to “nice going, man” with exaggerated eyebrow motions towards Caitlin. Cisco tries valiantly to shoo them away before Caitlin catches on that everyone seems to think they’re on a date. They’re friends. Just friends.

They finally run back into Barry and Iris at the hay ride.

“You should come with us!” Iris says, tugging them both by their elbows to the line. “It’ll be fun!”

Iris skillfully maneuvers Cisco and Caitlin into sitting together near the back of the wagon. The ride is bumpy and a little dull, but they suddenly take a turn and the fiery sunset is displayed over the river, lined with colorful autumn trees.

Caitlin sighs happily and leans her head on Cisco’s shoulder. “Thanks for convincing me to come,” she says quietly. “You were right, this is fun.”

Cisco grins, turning his head to brush his nose against her hair. “I’m glad you came. I definitely would have had to play third-wheel to Barry and Iris if you hadn’t saved me.”

Caitlin giggles then falls silent, and Cisco enjoys the moment, even if it’s just a moment between definitely-just-friends.

Yet another friend - Barry this time - slaps him on the shoulder while they’re waiting for Iris and Caitlin to come back from the bathrooms. “I’m glad you finally introduced me to your secret girlfriend,” he teases.

Cisco glares at him. “We’re not dating,” he says sternly. “Don’t spread rumors.”

Barry shrugs innocently, hands in his pockets. “I didn’t tell anyone,” he protests. “Jesse’s been asking _me_ about Caitlin. I had to tell her I hadn’t even met Caitlin yet.”

“Well tell Jesse that there’s nothing to ask about. We’re just friends,” Cisco says.

Barry looks doubtful. “Okay, man.”

Iris and Barry split off quickly to go to Iris’ dorm, which is in the opposite direction, and Cisco offers to walk Caitlin home.

“Any plans for Thanksgiving?” Cisco asks and they stroll down the dark street. “It’s just a few weeks away.”

Caitlin sighs. “I’m going home, but really just because the dorms are closing. Mom probably won’t even notice I’m there, she’ll probably be working.”

“I’m sorry,” Cisco says quietly, regretting bringing up a sore subject. A few days ago Caitlin had told him that Thanksgiving used to be a big family affair until her dad died.

“What about you?” Caitlin asks.

Cisco groans, rubbing his neck. “Pretty much the opposite,” he admits. “There’ll be, like, fifty people at my abuela’s. Dante will play piano, everyone will swoon, no one will remember what I’m studying at school. At least I’ll see my cousin’s kids, though, they’re sweet.”

“It must be nice,” Caitlin says dreamily, then grimaces. “Even if your brother sucks.”

Cisco laughs. “No family is perfect, I guess. Hey, you should come. If your mom’s not doing anything. There’s always tons of food.”

Caitlin turns to face him as they stop in front of her building, considering. “I don’t want to impose,” she says carefully.

He shakes his head. “You’re not. Don’t feel bad about saying no, though. I know my family is crazy, I won’t be offended.”

“No, that sounds great,” Caitlin says decisively, meeting his eyes. “I would love to come.”

Cisco grins stupidly. “Great.”

“So,” Caitlin hedges. “Thanks for tonight. I had an amazing time.”

“So amazing you forgot about the test Monday?” Cisco teases.

Caitlin makes a face. “Nope.”

“I’m really glad you came,” Cisco says softly.

Caitlin breathes in sharply and wraps her arms around his neck suddenly. Cisco freezes for a moment before relaxing, his hands coming up slowly to press against her back. Their cheeks brush when Caitlin pulls away and Cisco’s breath catches in his throat as their eyes meet, nose to nose. Cisco lets his gaze drift down to her mouth and back up, waiting, hoping, but then Caitlin steps away, eyes down, and Cisco digs his hands back into his pockets.

“Well, see you,” Cisco says lamely.

Caitlin nods, still not meeting his eyes. “Bye, Cisco,” she says, and walks away, disappearing through the door into her dorm.

Cisco has work all weekend at his off-campus job, but he texts Caitlin silly little memes and jokes. She doesn’t reply, but that’s not unusual. Caitlin’s not much of a texter and she’s probably buried under her notes, studying for their exam.

But Caitlin’s not in the library Monday morning. Or the dining hall at lunch. She doesn’t answer Cisco’s text message asking if she’s okay. He doesn’t see her in the chem exam until he turns his in and walks back up the stairs in the lecture hall, spotting her halfway up on the left. About as far away as she could get. She’s not in the library again the next day. She still doesn’t answer his texts.

Cisco searches for her in every dining hall on campus, plus the student union. He goes up and down every floor in the library and tries to catch her after class, but can never find her in the sea of people leaving the hall. He emails, texts, Facebook messages, and calls. After a week and a half, it’s clear. She’s ghosting him.

Barry shakes his head, confused, when Cisco tells him. “I don’t get it, man. You two were inseparable.”

Cisco lies on his back on the floor of their room, much cleaner since Barry started dating Iris. “I don’t get it,” he says hollowly. “She won’t even tell me what’s wrong.”

There’s nothing Barry can really say. He’d only met Caitlin once, after all. After a while of Cisco’s silence, Barry slips out to meet Iris, leaving Cisco to replay the night of the Halloween Festival on repeat. Was she upset he didn’t kiss her? Upset that he almost did? Had she heard the rumors that they were dating and get freaked out? Did she think that _he_ was spreading the rumors? She’d seemed excited to to his family’s Thanksgiving. Did she regret saying yes and was too embarrassed to face him? Did she just decide that she didn’t really like Cisco after all?

After almost an hour of staring blankly at his ceiling, Cisco makes up his mind. He’ll give her space and time. And if she never explains, well does he really want her in his life? Cisco tries not to think too hard about the answer to that (yes, yes he really does) and instead distracts himself with the new zombie apocalypse video game Barry had gotten. It’s the perfect vehicle for Cisco’s frustration, and tomorrow he’ll be back to normal. Or the old normal, anyway.

Cisco thinks he’s putting up a valiant effort at acting normal. He goes to work, studies in the library, pays attention in class. He hangs out with Barry and Iris, finally feeling less like a third wheel as he and Iris hit it off, and makes plans with some friends he hasn’t hung out with since the beginning of the semester. Thanksgiving comes quickly, and he makes plans to meet Barry and Iris at Jitters the morning after Thanksgiving while Iris’ dad, Joe, drops him off at his parents’ house.

At home, Cisco grins and bears it through the questions about his love life, general disregard of his engineering classes, and insistence that he still has time to switch to pre-med. He helps his mom prepare food for Thanksgiving, plays with his cousins’ kids, and hangs out on the porch late at night with his favorite cousin, Luisa.

“So,” Luisa says, handing him a coca-cola. “Who’s the girl?” She pauses to consider. “Or guy?”

Cisco pops open the tab and sips. “How’d you know?”

Luisa rolls her eyes and punches his arm gently. “How d’you think?”

He sighs. 

“C’mon,” she coaxes. “Dimelo.”

“We’re just friends,” Cisco says, playing with the tab on the can. “But she disappeared on me a couple weeks ago and I have no idea why.”

Luisa blinks. “She ghosted you?”

“Yeah,” Cisco groans. “I can’t figure it out. We went to this Halloween thing at school with Barry and Iris and she seemed like she had a really good time, but then on Monday, nada.”

“I’m sorry, primito,” Luisa says quietly. “That sucks.”

He nods.

“But,” she continues. “You deserve an answer, even if she doesn’t want to be friends. Does she live in Central City?”

“With her mom,” Cisco says. “I don’t know where, though.”

Luisa stands and offers him a hand. “Good thing you know me, then.” She hauls him to his feet and drags him inside to his computer, where she manages to track Caitlin down in a matter of minutes.

“That was scary,” Cisco says, impressed. “But awesome. You have to show me how to do that.”

“Maybe tomorrow,” Luisa agrees, handing him a post-it with the address. “Now, you go talk to Caitlin.”

Caitlin’s mom lives in the rich part of town, where the houses are mini mansions with perfectly groomed lawns and fenced-in backyards with big swimming pools. Cisco’s not really surprised; Caitlin had mentioned that her mom was very well-known and successful researcher. She hadn’t mentioned, however, that her mom was Carla Tannhauser of Tannhauser Industries, Cisco thinks when Dr. Tannhauser opens the door. She’d guest lectured in one of Cisco’s biology classes early in the semester.

“Can I help you?” Dr. Tannhauser asks cooly.

Cisco clears his throat. “I’m here to see Caitlin. I’m a friend.” I hope I am, anyway, he thinks to himself. 

“One moment,” Dr. Tannhauser says, and closes the door.

Cisco stares blankly at the closed door. Well then. She’s either as cold as Caitlin described or just plain racist.

When the door opens again, it’s Caitlin on the other side. She pales when she sees Cisco and steps out onto the porch, closing the door behind her. “What are you doing here?” She asks, crossing her arms tightly across her chest.

Cisco rocks back on his heels. “I’m here to ask why you’ve been ignoring me,” Cisco says, forging on even when Caitlin opens her mouth. “If you don’t want to be friends anymore, I’ll respect that, but I think I deserve an explanation.”

Caitlin is shivering, whether from the cold or something else, Cisco can’t tell. “I started seeing someone,” she blurts out. “An ex.” Her cheeks are bright red. “I didn’t mean to ignore you, I’ve just been really busy.”

“Okay,” Cisco says dully. He suspects that’s not the whole truth, because why wouldn’t she sit next to him in class if she was just busy? 

“I, um, I should get back inside,” Caitlin says, moving towards the door. “I’ll see you back at school!” She says brightly, and then she’s gone.

Cisco is left staring at the door once more, this time a nasty feeling growing in his chest. Is it really worse to be ghosted than to be rejected outright, he wonders. Because this feels pretty shitty.

It’s worse back at school. No matter how much Cisco tries to bury the hurt under work and school, it keeps popping back up every time he sees Caitlin in the library or walking around campus or sitting with someone else in the dining hall. And to make everything even more awful, everyone keeps telling Cisco how sorry they are that he and Caitlin broke up, and how nice they were together, and how they hope everything will work out. Cisco takes to putting his headphones on all the time and pretending to not hear anyone when they call his name.

Just a little more than a week before finals, Cisco juggles his bags, trying to dig out his keys, when his phone falls, unplugging from his headphones. Grumbling, he pulls them off and bends down to pick up his phone when he hears Caitlin’s name. He freezes, listening.

“- I haven’t seen her with anyone, much less a new boyfriend,” Iris says.

“That’s what she told Cisco,” Barry replies more quietly.

“Bullshit,” Iris snaps. “What the hell is going on with this girl?”

“Iris-”

“Doesn’t Cisco deserve better?” Iris asks angrily. “I’m _going_ to talk to her.” 

“I know,” Barry says. “Just - calm down a little before you do. No need to bite her head off.”

“Maybe she needs her head bitten off,” Iris grumbles as Cisco unlocks the door.

They both trail off as Cisco comes in.

“Hey,” Barry says awkwardly.

Iris rolls her eyes at Barry behind Cisco’s back. “Well, I was just going.” She pulls on her coat and gives Barry a kiss. “See you later, Cisco.”

Cisco waves as she leaves, sorting out the notebooks from his bag, thinking about what Iris said. Would she really confront Caitlin? Would Caitlin think he’d put her up to it? Somehow he manages to put it out of his mind and focus on calculus, and he forgets about it all until Caitlin knocks on his door three days later.

“Caitlin,” Cisco says dumbly.

“Hi, Cisco,” she whispers, hands clasped so tightly in front of her they’re white.

“Um, what’s up?”

She looks around. “Can I come in?”

Cisco steps aside silently and closes the door behind her. “Caitlin?”

“I lied,” she bursts out, turning to face him. “Cisco, I lied.”

“What?” Cisco asks, very lost.

Caitlin looks close to tears. “When you came to my house during Thanksgiving break to ask why I was ignoring you. I lied.”

“Okay,” Cisco says slowly, sitting on his bed. “Why?”

She’s standing in the middle of the room still, shoulders hunched up and arms wrapped around her stomach. “I was scared,” she admits in a tiny voice. “After you walked me home from the Halloween Festival, and we almost - it scared me.”

Cisco rubs his forehead. “So you completely ghosted me?”

She shrinks even more. “I’m so sorry.”

Cisco pats the spot next to him on the bed. “Maybe you should start at the beginning. I’m not really sure I understand.”

Caitlin perches on the edge. “Last year I dated this guy, Jay. Except his name wasn’t really Jay.”

Cisco sits up, startled, but motions for her to keep going.

“He went to a different school, and it didn’t even occur to me that he was lying. He seemed really sweet, and he told me all the right things. But when I tried to break up with him last summer, he freaked out. He - well, he kidnapped me, threatened to do all these awful things, before the police found me. It turns out he was a psychopath. And a serial killer.” She shudders. “I guess I still have a lot of trust issues.”

“That’s understandable,” Cisco says quietly. “I’m so sorry, Caitlin.”

She shakes her head, turning to face him. “I really like you. I had a great time at the festival, and I really did want to spend Thanksgiving with you. But,” she flushes, “I guess I thought you were going to kiss me, and then over the weekend I got in my own head and freaked myself out.”

Cisco nods. 

“I convinced myself that it would be better for both of us if I just - cut things off, I guess,” Caitlin whispers. “And when you showed up at my house I couldn’t bear telling you I didn’t want to see you anymore, because I did…”

“So you lied,” Cisco finishes.

She nods. “It was a pretty bad lie. I don’t even know if I hoped you would believe it or not.”

“I didn’t,” Cisco admits. “But I definitely got the message that you didn’t want to see me.”

Caitlin sighs, twisting her fingers in her lap. “But I did want to see you. I _do_ want to see you. I just need -”

Cisco scoots over a little until they’re hip-to-hip, putting his hand over hers. “To take it slow?” He suggests.

“Yeah,” Caitlin breathes.

Cisco leans his forehead on hers. “I can do that.”

Caitlin tips her head to kiss him and Cisco relaxes into it. When she pulls back, she’s smiling, cheeks pink.

Cisco brushes her hair off her face. “Slow is good.”

**Author's Note:**

> "Hide and Seek" by Imogen Heap


End file.
